Good, not perfect
Hello dear readers,
Today I want to touch base on a concept I’ve talked about before. And that is, don’t let perfect be the enemy of good enough. Something that is done and shared is better than something that is perfect, but never shared.
Since we mostly talk about books and art and writing, let me use a book manuscript as an example.
If you are writing a book, chances are you will have several drafts to your novel. But there comes a point where you must say “This is good enough. I declare it finished.” and release it into the world. Even if it’s not perfect. Nothing is perfect. And striving for that perfection can keep you from actually getting your work out into the world and making a difference.
I must admit that I have been dragging my feet when it comes to writing my next book. I am so deeply afraid that it will be bad that I am really struggling to force myself to take time to work on it. When I wrote A Songbird’s Tale, I threw myself at it with wild abandon and with the naivety of a complete beginner. Now that I’ve got one book under my belt, starting the next one feels, in some ways, insurmountable.
I was talking to Dustin the other day about how much I want to write, but how insecure I feel about it. I have been putting so much pressure on myself to do a perfect job, that I have become paralyzed with the fear of doing anything less than a spectacular job. Thus robbing me of the joy of writing, and also slowing down my progress.
The thing is, our brains are hardwired to think in extremes, to think in terms of “all or nothing”. If my book isn’t spectacular then it’s going to be garbage. Readers, this simply isn’t true. This applies to so many areas of our life. If I let that fear of not doing a perfect job hold me back, then I’ll never get any more books out into the world, and that’s certainly not what I want.
If you are always waiting for perfect, then the time will never come. We learn by doing, and doing a lot. You learn more by drawing 10 drawings or writing 10 short stories than you do by trying to complete one perfect masterpiece. Another writing example, just finish your first draft. Let it be bad. A first draft’s only job is to exist. If you get so hung up on making your first draft great, and never finish, how can you expect to publish? Things MUST reach a point of good enough for there to be any real forward progress.
But Tiffani, how do I overcome this fear? A fair question, and not one that I have a perfect answer for. (Ha. See what I did there?) It’s a process of changing your own thoughts and expectations. One of the strategies my coach has been working with me on is to get curious. What is it exactly you are afraid of? What happens if you sit with your fear and talk to it?
For me, I’m afraid that I will do a bad job, that people will hate my work, and that will mean that I am, in some way, also bad. I acknowledge these feelings as normal. Everyone wants to be liked and to belong to some degree, we’re social creatures and it is hardwired into us. I know that not everyone will like my work, and that’s ok! But what if the vast majority of readers hate it? Ah, but let’s get curious again, what if the vast majority of readers love it?
Allow yourself space to just sit with your feelings. Don’t judge yourself for them, no matter what they are, and ask instead what those feelings might be trying to tell you. Your brain may likely jump to the worst possible scenario as an outcome, which, again, is normal. Our brains are designed to look for problems and potential pitfalls in order to help keep us alive. Make sure not to berate yourself for having those fears or concerns, but do make sure you take time to consider the alternative. What might it be like if it all works out? What might it be like if things work out way better than we could possibly image? Those are some pretty compelling thoughts.
Bringing it back the main point, if you get too hung up on perfect to finish your project, then you won’t be ready when the opportunity comes and you won’t even have the chance to find out what it might be like if things work out way better than you could have possibly imaged. So make sure you allow yourself the latitude to decide when something is good enough. Good, maybe even great, but not perfect.
For me, at least, that’s what I want. I’d rather have 6 really good (and finished) books available for readers to purchase, rather than still be struggling to perfect one manuscript that isn’t doing any good by sitting on my computer and have nothing else to show for my work.
I write about this because I feel like this is a lesson I’m having to constantly remind myself of. Lately more so than usual. Maybe it will strike a cord with you as well?
Till next time, dear reader, go forth and do good things! I give you permission to consider something “good enough” to be done with it so that you can move on to the next thing. Only by starting, doing, finishing, and starting again can you continue to create, to learn, and to grow. And besides, if you keep your work all to yourself and never share it, you are depriving the world of something only you can provide. Your unique, one-of-a-kind perspective and experience. Do the thing that only you can do and be yourself, and create the things only you can create. I’m rooting for you. <3 Tiff
